Get Him to the Greek

What: Get Him to the Greek
Where: Nuneaton Odeon
Who: ME, Becky, Tom, Wayne and Lisa
When: Friday 25th June 2010 9:15


Just back off Holiday and straight to the cinema the next day. I actually got the invite whilst sitting on a runway waiting for take off but didn’t answer until the next day. Now those of you that know me will know that I don’t usually go for comedy films but the one man who I make the exception for is Russell Brand. This man in my eyes is amazing and can do no wrong. I’ve seen him in live stand up twice and was an avid listener to his weekly radio show which was cut short because of the ridiculous over-reaction of the British media. However He is fresh funny and unique and his performance as Aldus Snow in Forgetting Sarah Marshall stole the whole show. So could a starring role as the same character in a film that is not a sequel but more of a spin-off produce the goods. Sadly the answer is no.

Don’t get me wrong this is not a bad film and in parts is very funny but it doesn’t compare to its predecessor and unfortunately to succeed it really had too. FSM was brilliantly written by the very funny Jason Segal who is missing from the credits on GHTTG except for a token “based on characters created by”

At it’s heart Get Him To the Greek is a traditional buddy comedy starring Russell Brand and Jonah Hill as drug addled rock star and producer however to do a buddy comedy well you need a funny guy and a straight guy however Johan ruins this film by constantly trying to out funny his obviously more talented counter part. However Brand is not perfect either, the character is a riddled cliché and nothing about the writing of Aldus Snow is original.

Normally at this point I’d give you a lesser character that is played well and stands out however this time I have to give you a lesser character who is so distractingly bad it almost ruins the whole film and that is Jonah’s girlfriend played by Elisabeth Moss. She is 100% awful in this film and I am not in the business of slagging people off I respect anyone who can make it onto my cinema screen and I am sure she is a very competent actress but she really is terrible in this. If I had to pick a stand out performance from someone I would say Sean “P Diddy” Coombs who is incredibly funny as Jonahs boss Sergio.

In conclusion I realise I’ve been very negative in this review but I can’t deny that there was some very funny moments in this film, “Rub the furry wall”

6/10

A Nightmare on Elm Street

What: Nightmare on Elm Street
Where: Nuneaton Odeon
Who: ME and Alex
When: Tuesday 18th May 2010 7pm

I’m sure at some point in the future both of us will regret it but recently me and Alex made a pact that if one of us wanted to see a film the other one would have to go and see it. This could lead to some horrific situations in the future and I think Alex was expecting this to be the first of those times. Not being a fan of horror films he was understandably reluctant to go and watch this but I think he was pleasantly surprised as was I.

I have brought myself up on horror films and slasher flicks and ever since I managed to scare the living daylights of myself watching the shining in secret in my room one night as a child I have enjoyed this genre above all others. There is always room in my life for a teen slasher flick and good or bad they are always worth checking out. In my opinion the best of these is undoubtedly the original Nightmare on Elm Street. Made by Wes Craven in 1984 Robert Englund took on the part of maniacal dream intruder Freddie Kruger and made it is own and went on to play the part on no less than 7 further occasions.

So for somebody else to take on the role must have been a real challenge and although he will always be compared to Englund and in fairness he will never match it Jackie Earle Haley took on the role and did something completely different with it which I guess he had to do. The last thing this film needed was an Englund impression and I was quite happy to see that this wasn’t the case.

Teen slasher flicks are notorious for never having a teenager in sight. 17 years olds being portrayed by adults in there mid to late twenties as become the norm and this film is no different.. The youngest in this film is 23 year old former heroes star Thomas Dekker. The original Nightmare on Elm street granted Johnny Depp is first ever role this might explain why this particular slasher flick as actually attracted a cast of “teen” stars that do actually have some acting talent which again is a rarity in slasher flicks. Apart from Haley, Dekker is the standout from this film and if he handles himself well I reckon this talented young actor could have a decent future. Maybe not quite to the levels Depp has achieved but who knows the sky is the limit.

My main criticism of this is that it just isn’t scary enough. There is not enough gore and what few jump scenes there are in this are too predictable. Normally The slightest thing makes me jump but I don’t think I jumped once in this which is probably good coz by the end I had never needed to wee so much in my life. Sorry too much information??

As recent remakes go this is up there with the last house on the left which I actually thought was better than the original and is much better than Friday the 13th.

If you enjoy watching American teens getting ripped up this is a good enjoyable little film. I will not compare it to the original because if you do it will take your enjoyment away. I thoroughly believe that every piece of work should be viewed on it’s own merits and it is unfair to compare it to it’s predecessor. In the same way a film should never be compared to the book it is based on enjoy this for what it is and then go and watch the original and enjoy that too.

7/10

Iron Man 2

What: Iron Man 2
Where: Nuneaton Odeon
Who: Me, Mark, Becki, Alex, Sarah, Stu & Marv
When: Monday May 3rd, 8pm

A nice big group of people to go and see what is set to be the blockbuster hit of the year and it’s not even May yet. This trip took 2 cars full of people and on a night where I expected queues out of the door with it being bank holiday and everything we walked straight in although it did fill up by the time the film started.

So the original Iron man film a few years ago took the world by surprise when it came from nowhere and broke all sorts of box office records and made some unbelievable money. And it was actually pretty good although I’ve always thought it was slightly flawed by the first 30 minutes or so being slightly dull and so I was looking for slightly more from this one and boy does it deliver.

Firstly you can’t write about Iron man 2 without discussing the cast, Get this list:
• Robert Downey Jr
• Mickey Rourke
• Don Cheadle
• Samual L Jackson
• Sam Rockwell
• Gwyneth Paltrow
• Scarltt Johanson

That list is incredible and every single one of them is on top of there game in this. Stand outs go to RDJ who was born to play Tony Stark I don’t think anyone can deny that. Although Mickey Rourke is brilliant in this film I have to give my other stand out performance to a man who is potentially the most underrated man in Hollywood and that man is Sam Rockwell. Justin Hammer is very unlikeable and a bit goofy perfect from Rockwell and he relishes in the role.

The film unlike it’s predecessor is engaging and very fun from start to end and I would quite happily have watched another 30 minutes or so of it and I can’t say that very often.

In summary if you like superhero movies (and lets face it there has been a lot of superhero guff over the last few years) then you will love this, if you like action films you will love this and if you like top quality acting from 7 of Hollywoods finest you will love this film.

8/10

Clash of the Titans 3D

What: Clash of the titans 3D
Where: Nuneaton Odeon
Who: Me, Alex, Stu and Ash
When: Thursday, April 08th 2010 9pm

First cinema trip of April and the film choice went to Alex. It has been almost a week now since this trip and it has taken me this long to decide what I actually thought of it. And here it is:

The story in itself is ok, the acting is poor and the 3D is absolutely atrocious.

Seriously the 3d conversion in this film is a disgrace and the people responsible should be ashamed of themselves. A 3d film at Nuneaton costs over £2 more than standard and it is for that reason that I will no longer choose to see films in 3D. I will state again that the current trend for everything to come out in 3d is a fad and will pass. 3D film definitely has a future but the money hungry studios are in with a real chance of saturating the market and destroying what when its done well is the greatest innovation in cinema since colour.

So what about the film. Well if you close your eyes to the glaring inaccuracies in the story (mainly that the Kraken is a Norse myth and definitely not Greek) the action is pretty good. The CGI at times is fantastic but at other times is very poor. Why they choose not to cast an actress as Madussa head is beyond me. The whole Madusa segment is laughable in its poor quality.

The acting is hit and miss as well. Liam Neeson and Ralph Fienes stand out where as Sam Worthington is poor and not a patch on what we know he is capable of.

I don’t really have a lot more to say about this film other than if you are going to see if DO NOT watch it in 3d and don’t expect it to change your life because it definitely wont.

4/10

Alice In Wonderland

What: Alice in Wonderland 3D
Where: Nuneaton Odeon
Who: Me, Arran, Beck, Mum and Dad
When: Monday, March 8th 2010 at 8o’clock

A family outing to the cinema is something I’m pretty sure hasn’t happened for about 8 years. (Scorpion King in case you were wondering). So to say I was a little surprised when the parents decided that the latest Tim Burton masterpiece was something they were interested in, the family outing was on. Dad drove and I brought the tickets and got 460 pints on my Odeon card for my troubles

At this point I should let you all in on the fact that in my eyes the magical combination of Tim Burton Johnny Depp and HBC can do no wrong. I knew before I even saw a trailer for this film that I was going to love it. Alice in Wonderland is a disjointed dark fairy tale and so who better to make it than the master of the dark fairy tale Tim Burton.

The 3d is not a necessity in this film as much as it is in Avatar and the film could be seen without it, at the end of the day the current trend of 3d film making is a gimmick and unless a film is specifically made with 3d in mind like avatar and the forthcoming remake of Tron there is little point in it. Although it does still look good.

However the acting performances in this film are what stands out. Every single person in this is incredibly strong. From Johnny and Helena who is possibly better than she has ever been to Alan Rickman, Stephen Fry, Matt Lucas and Barbara Windsor who make the film what it is with there supporting roles.

I think it was Jonathon Ross who said that this is Johnny’s strongest performance I don’t think I would go that far, it would take an awful lot to match his performance as Edward Scissorhands and Captain Jack but it’s not far off. He really conveys the insanity of the character he is playing to perfection.

But as I briefly alluded to earlier, this show is well and truly stolen by a stand out masterclass from Helena Bonham Carter. Married to the director she is often accused of riding on his coat tails only being cast because of who she is. Nothing could be further from the truth HBC is one of the most underrated stars of our generation. She is cast in every Tim Burton film because she personifies his mad cap universe and nobody could play the parts he gives her better than she does. I found myself watching this waiting for her to come back on to the screen.

Admitidly the CGI effects in this film may not withstand the test of time and will probably look dated very soon but who cares they work in the world that Tim has created. It’s not a perfect film far from it but it is a great story retold through the mind of one of the greatest visionaries around starring the greatest character actor alive today alongside the only character actress working today.

8/10

The Crazies

What: The Crazies
Where: Coventry Showcase
Who: Me, Rob, Becky & Wayne
When: Wednesday 3rd March 2010 at 19:15

A film visit suggested by Rob is a new one on me but it was good to get to the cinema with people who you are not used to going with sometimes, the journey was a bit of a pain getting stuck in traffic on the way there risking life and limb edging past a police car onto the M6/M69 roundabout before driving through some of the biggest pot holes ever recorded and later grounding your car on a speed bump and that’s all before you have to get into a Wednesday cinema queue. Note to self always avoid cinemas on a Wednesday unless you are on Orange, although credit must go to the lovely girl signing people up to the showcase insider club.

So what did I think to the Crazies.

Over the years I have sat through a number of zombie films. I can’t say I’ve enjoyed them all there is a lot of undead junk out there if you go looking for it but there is a lot of quality too and a good zombie story can be really effective if done correctly. So when I heard of the Crazies which in essence is a zombie film with no zombies in it. I was pretty intrigued. Unfortunately zombies that have never been dead are a lot less scary than a zombie that has been dead at some point.

When an enormous plane manned by a lone pilot crashes into the middle of a small redneck township and nobody notices (except, in the first of this films many clichés, the town drunk) a lethal toxin is introduced into the towns water supply. This In an unexplained way then starts to turn whoever drinks it into crazies intent on causing pain and suffering on the uninfected. Sounds good? No, really you do surprise me.

This film starts out dull but gets better in the middle, the scene in the carwash is very intense and is one of the few times in the film where you actually feel for the characters in the film. Whilst we are on the subject of this films characters let me just say that this bunch are pretty dull. Nobody really cares who becomes infected and who doesn’t. And if Judy Dutton is pregnant at the beginning of this film as is claimed then she certainly isn’t by the end of it although by the look of her she can be no more than a couple of days gone at the most. I dunno maybe the costume department forgot the bump suit. Anyway I’m rambling.

Now where shall I start with the ending. I’m not going to give anything away but it caused me to smile and just shake my head slowly. Appalling doesn’t even begin to describe the ending of this film and then the sequel tease at the very end causes more fear than the rest of the film put together purely that this film will potentially get a sequal is enough to strike fear in the hearts of any man. Then the credits roll and one of the first names you see is, George A Romero and that is just plain scary.

4/10

How LOST changed my life

There are many things in this life that I don’t understand and I’m sure I will go to my death bed not knowing the answer to many of lifes questions but the biggest unanswered question in my life so far is:

How can people not enjoy Lost?

Since the show first aired on the day that Oceanic 815 either did or didn’t crash I have been absolutely in love with a tv show more than I would have ever thought possible. The excitement I felt in the build up to last Fridays season 6 opener was pretty intense and boy was it worth the wait. This however is not a review of that particular episode. I would never be able to be impartial enough to review Lost and so am not even going to attempt it. Anyone who knows me knows of my obsession and will understand that. So what is this post going to be about. To be honest I’m not 100% sure myself yet I just have to get something down to record how I am feeling following the shows return because I know that very soon Lost will be over forever and believe me when I tell you that the thought of that is truly terrifying.

I can honestly say with no doubt in my mind that Lost has changed my life. Since its inception back in 2004 I have become an avid follower of all things American. America at the minute without a shadow of a doubt is producing some of the best drama ever, you just have to look at shows like Dexter and House and even the rejuvenated 24 for proof of that. I don’t know if Lost started that and I’m not going to sit here and say that Lost changed the world but it certainly caused me to sit up and listen.

It’s not all rosy though there are some stinkers out there and you don’t have to look very far to get to them. You just have to look at the astonishing fall from grace that Heroes has achieved and the massive flop that Flash forward is and always will be. Flash forward was launched as an alternative to Lost but that is almost an insult. No scratch that. To compare this nothing of a show filled with bad writing bad acting boring characters and no direction to Lost is a damn insult and yes I am taking it personally. There is no way on earth that Flash forward can be saved and if it gets renewed for a second season I will be the most surprised man on earth. It is also time for NBC to cut its losses with heroes (Talk about flogging a dead horse), but my hatred for heroes is a whole article in itself. Who knows maybe I will write it one day. But this article is about Lost a show that no matter what happens will end after this current season concludes.

Lost fans are sometimes considered arrogant, obsessive and over the top in there praise for the show that they love but that is the point. We will defend it to the hilt we will be arrogant about it because there is nothing even remotely close to the quality that this shows oozes from every pore. If you don’t watch it, I’m not trying to persuade you to buy the box sets and start because in all honesty. You’re too late. Half the fun of lost is the gap between episodes and seasons. Because this is where the theorising and the guessing and the being completely wrong about everything comes into play and that is what sets lost apart from everything else. Nobody who watches lost in the future will ever get that experience from it and that is a shame. However I’m not telling you not to watch it because even if you think you might be remotely interested you should go out there and you should make the effort to watch it. You will be rewarded I promise you.

The depth of the writing is truly flabbergasting and anyone who thinks they make it up as they go along should be admitted to Santa Rosa themselves. It is not luck that everything in this show ties up it is quality attention to detail.

The one thing I get asked about lost the most especially as it begins to come towards its conclusion is “what if you don’t like the ending?” I honestly think this is impossible. I have complete faith that the writers know what they are doing and they have never let me down before. There is no way that they can mess up the ending because I trust that no matter what they come up with will be perfectly executed and will fit into this mysterious world that they have spent the best part of 6 years creating.

It is fact that since season 2 started lost has actually halved it’s audience that equates to roughly 12 million Americans alone that have given up on lost. These are the people I pity the most. I don’t want to insult anyone. Oh who am I kidding of course I do. These people clearly lack something and are more interested in paint by numbers crap tv that you don’t have to think about. These people obviously prefer to just sit and get baby fed a show step by step. They are probably the very same people that are still watching heroes. Open up your minds for gods sake.

So in summery if you watch lost you will understand the majority of this piece of rambling. If you don’t watch lost you are too late to get the full experience but the whole history of this show is still out there and it’s well worth a watch and if you used to watch lost and gave up on it then get out. you’re not worth my time.